Farewell to the Fort, from Kathay

The end of the year always seems to call for a reminiscing post. This one is a bit heavier, as it will be my last post as part of the Honors College. Our students move on from us every year, and it's always a joy to watch them embark on something new, while wishing they could stay around just a little longer. This time, I'm the one moving on. It comes with just as much joy to move on to something new, but with a harsh separation from many who have become an important part of my life. 

Just over seven years ago, the founding director, Matt, gave me the opportunity to join the team. I had to pick up and move a state over in just a few days, and I really didn't know what I was getting into. I'd had my own adventures in higher ed, for better or worse...a little more worse than not, but I didn't really know how it worked from the inside. I knew it was always a struggle for me, and I thought I could at least be of use to students who face the same challenges. Now, the Honors College would not have been something I would have sought on my venture into college, so I knew their struggles might be different, but people are people, and I like to be in a position to support them. So, I figured I'd wing it, and I guess it went pretty well. 

The Honors College was still very new when I came aboard, and we went through changes from start to end. Hopefully, it will remain a program that evolves with the students and allows them to be part of the process for many years to come. I was able to learn so much from my directors, Matt and Kevin, and many others on campus, but nothing compares to what I learned from the students themselves. The system is imperfect, so we strive to identify the paths that are most beneficial for each student. Sometimes this is glaringly obvious, and students are mind-blowingly capable of powering through; sometimes it's not so obvious, and students have barriers that feel immovable. Our job is to be in the trenches with them, celebrate the high points with them, serve as navigators or mentors, buffer the imperfect system, and find their yellow brick road to their definition of success. As much as we try to make one, there is no playbook for that. 

I filled in the blanks as we went, and each student who came to me with questions and troubles informed how I handled the next and motivated me to make things better when and where I could. Sometimes that involves screaming into the void, but sometimes it's simply finding out why we do things the way we do. I built on that foundation with a master's degree, and none of that would have been possible for me without FHSU's tuition support and the support from Kevin and our students. (Not to mention the support of my friends, family, cats, and the patience of my instructors, while trying to earn a degree while working, much of that through Covid. It went as well as could be expected, so I will remain proud of that!)

I have no final words of wisdom for my students; the wisdom they need will change, and I hope they know they can always find me when they need someone. I'm not leaving them, I'm just changing location and offering my services elsewhere. My career in higher education will continue, so they will always be a part of my foundation and motivation. 

My time in Hays (both times) was full of unexpected things--good, bad, and ugly, and I met some of the best people I will ever know there. I'm grateful for everything I've learned, and I suppose my word of advice to anyone is never forget that there's always more to learn. 

Thank you to my directors, both of them, for believing in me and continuing to support me as a person after we no longer share a hallway. Matt continues to support my professional development after all this time, and Kevin is simply one of the greatest friends a girl could ask for. He was a great boss, too, but I consider it a stroke of good luck that I get to keep him in my circle. He's a fierce advocate for our students, annoyingly talented, and he's been a huge support for my family for many years. Life isn't quite the same when I can't pop in and commiserate. I'm not sure I would have the confidence I have coming into a new job without his mentorship and friendship.  

Thank you to all my student staff, ambassadors, volunteers, and "special Nuggets" for all the time you give to the Honors College, for all the support you've given me in wrangling things, and for being willing to learn why we do what we do. In the beginning, I was overwhelmed by acronyms and Honors-this and Honors-that, and the student staff filled in the gaps as we transitioned leadership. I would have been useless without them. Kaytee, Michael, Ryan, and Sam made it so that the program made it through Covid. Memories in my office with Caden, Nathaniel, James, and many others remain core joyful memories. More recently, we have had a committed crew of now-seniors helping us keep an overflowing program from drowning us. They know who they are, but our formal staff members, Chesney and Samantha, have truly kept us afloat, and will continue to do so with a few other comrades during their upcoming period without an Assistant Director. Sam is a quiet force, full of compassion. She consistently and reliably helps when I'm at my wits' end. It's impossible for me to summarize the positive impact Chesney has had on the program. I'm so grateful for her in many ways. She's a delightful fireball, and she'll make a difference wherever she goes. She seeks to learn, is willing to take on big things, but keeps her feet on the ground. I'm really proud of her, and I'll miss her terribly. There's a solid group of sophomores and others stepping up, and I'm confident they will carry the HC forward with their own new ideas and commitment to service for their fellow Honorables. I'll be following along from afar. 

So many others supported the Honors College over my time there, and we're grateful for all of those who really "get it". From our committee members and administrators who help out at a moment's notice, to donors and parents, they're all part of the team. They understand the bigger picture of why students are pursuing the paths they are, and they all contribute to make it a rewarding experience. The big picture of student support is particularly important right now because students often get lost in the policies, bureaucracy, and other complexities that can disconnect them from their academic, professional, and personal goals. They're not pieces of a pie to be divided among offices; they're smart, motivated people who seek a solid foundation for their future. They should all be treated as the valuable treasures they are, even when we don't quite get what they're about. (I offer similar sentiments for student-serving folks all over this world, committing their time to supporting education.) 

While there are many things I'm grateful to leave behind, the Honors College is not one of them. A little piece of me will be left there. A quote sometimes attributed to Winnie the Pooh (though inaccurately, I believe) is relevant: How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. 

Logging off... I leave you with some of my favorite moments.